April 25, 2014 by gn0mel0ver

Nutella Whoopie Pie Cookies

I know.

It is at this point that you are probably wondering if I am sticking to my diet. The answer is, “yes.”

“How?” I can hear you wonder.

Well, I do not recommend that you do what I do. But let’s just say, a cookie for lunch ain’t somethin’ I’m new to.

You, of course, could eat some carrots, too.

I won’t.

But you could.

Priorities, peeps.

I recently shared my Peanut Butter Nutella Cookie recipe here. These are very similar. One day, I thought, Hey, Jenni. Why don’t you add all Nutella and skip the peanut butter?

So I did.

Only… While the rest of my family liked the cookies just fine. Well, I thought to myself, Self. These are still needin’ somethin’.

What if you added frosting? Self, what if you made a cookie sandwich and put the frosting in the middle?

Then when someone asks you what you had for lunch, you can say, ‘a sandwich.’ And nobody will be the wiser.

So I did.

If you cannot tell by now, that voice pretty much makes all of the decisions in my life. I am not sure… But, you guys, I think it is coming from my thighs.

The voice is booming. And it’s ~~kinda~~ shaky.

And that is why I am writing this recipe and not doing laundry.

And that is why I had a sandwich for lunch.

And that is why I am happy.

On to the happiness:

Ingredients:

1 tsp. vanilla extract
1/2 tsp. salt
1 tsp. baking soda
1 stick (1/2 cup) softened salted butter
1 egg
1 and 3/4 cups flour
2 Tbsp. cocoa powder
2 Tbsp. Milk
2/3 cup chocolate hazelnut spread (I use Nutella)
Caviar from one vanilla bean (if you do not have this, you can use 1/2 more tsp. vanilla extract)
1/2 cup melted semi-sweet chocolate chips
1/2 Tbsp. Cold brewed coffee
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1 cup organic brown sugar (organic brown sugar is so much better. I am not part of the organic movement, but I will not buy anything else.)

Ingredients for frosting (you have options here):

1 can of cream cheese or vanilla frosting

Nutella

Or my favorite: I chose to use this recipe for most of my cookies. You will need: 5 Tbsp. Flour, 1 cup milk, 1 tsp. vanilla, 1 cup butter, 1 cup granulated sugar. It is a surprisingly easy and delicious frosting.

Marshmallow fluff

Directions:

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees. Or 325 degrees Convect Bake if you have a convection oven.

Pour the 1/2 cup granulated sugar in a separate bowl and set aside while you work on the following.

In a bowl with a hand mixer or in your bowl on your stand mixer, beat butter and brown sugar until light. Stop mixer and add in your vanilla and vanilla bean caviar. Mix.

Now add Nutella, melted chocolate chips and coffee and mix together until completely incorporated.

Add the milk and mix.

Add the egg and mix until light and fluffy.

Turn mixer to low and add in salt, cocoa powder and baking soda. Mix until incorporated.

Add flour and mix.

Turn off mixer. Now take a small ball of cookie dough and roll it on your hands. Drop the ball into the bowl of granulated sugar and gently roll it around.

Place the ball of dough on a baking sheet. Repeat this step until your baking sheet is filled with cookie dough balls evenly spaced apart.

With a fork, make two flat indentations onto each cookie.

With a spoon, scoop up some of the granulated sugar and pour a little sugar over marks left from the fork.

Place baking sheet into the oven and bake for 10-11 minutes until edges are just a little brown. Do not cook longer. You do not want these overcooked.

Transfer baked cookies to a cooling rack.

Repeat with remaining dough. Turn oven off.

Let the cookies cool.

For these cookies, I opted to make the best frosting to put between them. This version tasted like a homemade Oreo. Frost one backside of a cookie. Place the backside of another cookie against the frosting.

You made a sandwich!

Now eat your lunch!

I also did a pure Nutella Whoopie Pie (the cookie appears lighter because I forgot the melted chocolate chips in this batch. Doh!) by spreading Nutella in between the cookie layers.

Gosh. I love that voice inside my ~~thighs~~ head.

And that voice loves…

~~Ryan Gosling~~ Sandwiches.

Oh! But what about a Ryan Gosling Sandwich?

Self. You’ve gone too far. Eat your cookie.

P.S. I shared this on Savvy Southern Style.

And My Romantic Home.

March 4, 2014 by gn0mel0ver

Pistachio Pudding Pie

This green pie is perfect for Saint Patrick’s Day. Or any other day without a saint in it. And you just want to have a creamy green pie.

As you are wont to do.

But here is where I lose you. I don’t really like nuts. I will eat peanuts. Plain. Salted. By themselves. But I do not want or like them in any of my food. I do not like the unexpected crunch and/or texture. Well, besides a Snickers bar. But Snickers is a perfection above all mundane rules.

If you are a child, like myself, keep reading for a sweet dessert using easy ingredients…

I love pistachio ice cream. And gelato. Or at least I thought I did, except my heart would sob whenever I tried a new brand of pistachio ice cream. I would lift the lid. And see… Beige?! No. No. No. I want the artificial green stuff, please. You can keep your organic, all na-tur-aaaal. Give me dye. Give me sugar.

Give me fake.

I discovered Jello’s Pistachio Instant Pudding the other day ( um, Wha..?!). Upon immediately dumping four boxes into my cart, I stood in the aisle-of-all-that-makes-life-worth-living, contemplating how many more I needed to hoard for my new collection. What if they stop making this? I just discovered it. What if because I hadn’t been purchasing it, they think nobody wants it? How could I go on? But my husband interrupted my panic by asking, “Don’t you think that’s enough?”

“Oh. For tonight? Yea, that should be plenty.” I rushed home and read the back of the package.

“Pistachio Pudding Pie.”

Let me repeat.

“Pistachio Pudding Pie.”

The most perfect three words I had ever read.

I read the list of ingredients as quickly as I could. And, miracle of miracles, I had them all.

Ingredients:

3.4 oz. package Jello Pistachio Instant Pudding
premade graham cracker crust
1 and 3/4 cup whole milk
8 oz. tub of cool whip (or similar nondairy whipped cream)

First, I strained all of the disgusting bits from the pudding. AKA nuts.

I did this three times, because I wanted my pudding as smooth as possible.

I made the pudding according to the directions on the package. Essentially it is as easy as beating the milk and pudding mix for two minutes.

I slopped it into a pre-made graham cracker pie shell.

I put it in the refrigerator and patiently waited three hours for it to set.

Huh? What? Who are we kidding? Remember, we have all ready tested my patience for food before during my chocolate pie experience. It allows for thirteen minutes. At thirteen minutes I frantically grabbed a spoon from the drawer. And I skimmed the side of the pie with it. And my thighs wept. No, wait, that sounds gross. And my soul sang. And my thighs secretly rippled with excitement. Or they just rippled, ’cause that is their way…maybe pie is an ~~excellent~~ not such a good idea afterall.

Then I topped it with cool whip, covered it and reluctantly placed it back into the refrigerator.

I made this again a few weeks ago and doubled the amount of pistaccio pudding. I could do this, because I finally had hoarded enough pudding to the point I felt safe using some. I did this slowly over time, when my husband wasn’t with me and have packed the boxes into our pantry hidden from any pantry raiders that might come (or my husband who might commit me). In fact, I am rich in the stuff. So, I was all, two packages? Make it rain. Only instead of making it rain green paper, I let green powder rain into a bowl. I am frivolous like that. But I really liked the doubled recipe. If you are feeling super fancy when you make this, I would double the pudding packages. If you do this, you need to increase your milk to 2 and 3/4 cups. And follow the recipe above.

Have you made this? Do you like artificial green pistachio products or the real pistachio products? There’s no judgement here. I’m just sayin’ if you want some boxes, I know a guy who knows a guy who knows a girl who can get you some. I heard that some crazy lady is buying them all, so they might be running out.

But that’s just a rumor.

I’m sure.

P.S. I shared this on Savvy Southern Style.

And My Romantic Home.

January 9, 2014 by gn0mel0ver

It’s The Little Things: Pie Crust Cookies

I have been really sick. How sick? Well, I have not had a glass of wine since Christmas. That’s how sick. I know. Who knew it was possible? It has been thirteen days of a cold with a fever and I am now beginning to think it is time to see a doctor.

Or not.

We’ll see.

It makes for interesting dreams.

But in the meantime, my sweet mother brought me over the nicest gift in the world. It was a container of pie crust cookies.

Pie crust cookies happen to be my most favorite thing in the whole wide world. My mother and grandmother used to make them all through my childhood. They start with homemade pie crust dough (which is why I never make them). The pie crust dough is rolled out then generously sprinkled with cinnamon and sugar. Then cut into long irregular shapes, punched with a fork, and put into the oven to bake. Hence the clever name, “pie crust cookies.” I don’t know where or how they came up with that.

When she delivered these, I almost cried in my delirious state.

They have been what has kept me going these last few days.

Well, that and a glorious little product called ~~heaven~~ Sudafed.

Have you ever had these delightful little treats? And why does everything taste so much better when your mom makes it? What’s your favorite thing to have when you are sick? Spaghetti for some reason also always makes me feel better. It is what we are having for dinner tonight.

It’s the little things: anything that makes you feel better when you are sick.

Thanks Mom.

December 23, 2013 by gn0mel0ver

Pajama Party

I love my friends (my sweet sister being one of them).

Every year, I invite them over for a pajama party to watch a Christmas movie. This year we watched, “Four Christmases.” They were all too polite to rat me out, because the fact is, we had all ready watched this movie two years before. There are just not a lot of Christmas movies to choose from. I started this tradition with my all time favorite Christmas movie many years ago (and to be honest, one of my favorite regular movies, too), “White Christmas.”

Most of the girls didn’t like it.

So, now that is what my family watches every December 23rd together. This was what we did as a child growing up. I hope at least one of my children carries on this tradition with their own family. You tell me which child it will be based on the following conversation:

My son: “Mom, you should make everyone watch ‘White Christmas’ at your party. It’s a really good movie.”

Me: “I showed that before, a lot of the girls didn’t like it.”

Shocked gasp from the backseat.

Me: “But, we’ll watch it together in a few days.”

My daughter: “Ugh. Why do you force me to watch that evvvvvery year?”

My oblivious husband: “We don’t force you.”

Mean Mommy to Nice Daddy: “Um, yea, honey, we do.”

Poor kid. I can think of worse things, though.

I wore my pink gnome flannel pajamas. I was a wrinkled mess. I briefly entertained the thought of ironing my pajamas, but, who are we kidding? I can’t even iron my regular clothes. There is no way I am ironing something I am going to sleep in. Cross that out. There is no way I am ironing something.

A girl’s gotta have standards.

I did not take any pictures of the gathering. Everyone was comfy and I wanted to respect their laid back coziness without posting it all over the internet. I did take photos of the food, though.

I made homemade salsa for the party. I also served some queso dip from a jar, because I got it free with a coupon. Everyone loved the queso, including me. So I will be buying some more when I host my family Christmas Eve.

I whipped up a batch of chocolate chip cookies.

And homemade chicken pot pies.

I tried a Rachael Ray roasted sugar snap pea recipe. I don’t think I prepared the peas right. I have never served them before. Looking at my picture, was there something I was supposed to cut off?

The biggest hit of the night was definitely, “it tastes like a cinnamon roll cake.” Yum!

I gave prizes throughout the movie with my spur of the moment ~~drunken~~ trivia questions.

Everyone went home with a loaf of cinnamon burst bread from the local bakery. A neighbor gave me this as a gift last year and I really liked the sweet simpleness of the gesture. So, I copied them.

My friend Bridgette looked at the piano and said, “Is that bread on your piano?” This had both of us in hysterics. Because, yes, where else would you put your bread?

Some of us girls stayed up until 1:00 in the morning talking. I wish we could have stayed up later, but I was stressed out because my husband had to get up at 4:30 in the morning to go to work. Next year, I will ask him if he could get himself a late shift or take the next day off. It put a (small) damper on the night.

But, regardless, I was so happy and thankful to wind down and laugh with women who make my heart sing (missed you Lizzie). Thank you girls!

And no gathering would be complete without Ollie. He made sure to repel everyone with his continuous dog farts. Do I throw a good party or what? It’s not a party unless everyone is gagging and retching.

At least at my house.

Who needs alcohol when you have a bulldog?

Have you been to any holiday parties recently? Hopefully yours did not involve a flatulent dog.

Gnome Lover

Stumbling through life while still having fun

pie

Pistachio Pudding Pie

It’s The Little Things: Pie Crust Cookies

Pajama Party