September 16, 2014 by gn0mel0ver

Root Beer Chocolate Cake

Mmmmm. Hmmmmm. Ohhhhhh. Yeeeeeaaaaaaa. That is what I thought to myself when I watched Carla from The Chew (I love that show. And I love her. Anthropologie lovers, Carla wears a lot of clothes from there, on the show) make her chocolate root beer cake. I went online to get the recipe and I was disappointed to see that the recipe for the cake part differed from the one she made on t.v. I gave it up until I saw that someone in the comments had geniusly used a boxed cake mix and substituted the water it called for for root beer.

I can do that, I thought.

But then I didn’t.

I drank the root beer and ate some chocolate cookies and considered the flavor craving dealt with.

I had forgotten that I know myself well enough to have purchased two bottles of root beer. So when I came across the other bottle sitting unsuspecting on the shelf. Minding its own business. Not knowing that soon it would be meeting its soul mate, chocolate. No need to tell it about the part involving the oven. And then my mouth. Let’s be kind… I had to make the cake.

This is my new favorite cake. I am so excited to share this recipe. The best part about it is that it is incredibly easy to make. Well, and it tastes good. Our cake was gone in two days. We are a family of four. Two days. The math adds up to ~~gluttony~~ deliciousness.

Time to unite the star-crossed lovers…

Cake Ingredients:

1 devil’s food boxed cake mix
3 eggs
1/3 cup melted butter
1 cup root beer plus 3 Tbsp. root beer reserved for cooled cake rounds

Frosting ingredients:

1 cup root beer
1 1/2 cups powdered sugar
1 cup white chocolate melted (I used Merckens melting chocolates because I had it but she said to use white chocolate chips. Either will work)
A pinch of salt (I just added three shakes of my salt shaker)
1/2 cup (1stick) softened salted butter
1 tsp. vanilla extract

Directions:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. If you have a convection oven, preheat at 325 degrees F convect bake. Generously spray two nine inch round cake pans with nonstick cooking spray.

In your mixer or with a hand mixer in a bowl, beat together melted butter, eggs, cake mix, and one cup of root beer until mixed together. This is about one minute.

Pour cake mix evenly into the two cake pans. Give them each a gentle tap on the countertop to rid them of extra air bubbles. Put the cake pans in the oven and bake cake according to directions on box. Because of the fluffy mix produced from the root beer, my cakes needed two minutes longer than the longest baking time on the package (I baked mine thirty one minutes on convect bake).

Remove cake rounds from the oven. Let cool for five minutes in cake pans.

After five minutes, run a butter knife gently around the edge of the cake and the cake pan. Flip cake over onto cooling rack. Repeat with other layer. Allow to completely cool.

In the meantime, pour the one cup of root beer for the frosting into a small saucepan. On medium low heat simmer the root beer until it reduces to a third of a cup. I actually was overzealous with my simmer and reduced it to a quarter cup. This still worked out fine. This should be about five to seven minutes to reduce.

It will look like this. Turn off burner. Allow to cool.

Now that the cakes are cool, you are going to brush the cake layers evenly with the 3 Tbsp. of reserved root beer (not the reduced stovetop product! That is for the frosting) with a basting brush. Yep. Give the two lovers a wet root beer kiss.

Melt white chocolate (I put mine in a bowl and microwave for thirty second intervals, stirring each time. Usually takes 90 seconds to melt).

In your stand mixer or with your hand mixer in a bowl, beat together softened butter and powdered sugar until fluffy about two minutes. Add salt and mix. Add white chocolate and beat for a few seconds until incorporated. Add reduced stovetop root beer, and vanilla extract and blend until smooth.

I, very helpfully, do not have a picture of this part. I do, however, have a picture of me posing with the frosting. Which I have been told ~~has nothing to do with~~ is very important when baking a cake.

Place one cake round with basted root beer side up on a cake stand. Spread one third of the frosting on the layer towards the middle, leaving a little room at the edges because when you put the other cake layer on top, it will push the frosting further out.

Place the other cake layer on top of the frosted bottom layer. Frost top with remaining frosting. I like to place it in the middle and then gently ease it towards the edge until it barely goes over.

Cover or immediately serve.

Now eat the mingled lovers. Why does something that sounds so wrong taste so right? Don’t try to analyze it, just enjoy.

My daughter has requested this cake as her birthday cake coming up in October. She doesn’t even usually like cake. My husband woke me up the day after I had made this at 9:00 in the morning holding a plate with a half eaten large slice of the cake that he could not resist for breakfast (this is not a breakfast cake. He just has as much self control as his wife). Maybe he was feeling the ingredient love.

I promise, a bite of this cake , and you will feel the romance, too.

P.S. My Giveaway ends tonight at 9:00 PST. Please do not forget to enter.

August 14, 2014 by gn0mel0ver

Chess Squares

I do not know why, but I want to say the name of this recipe in the way Spongebob would do it. Okay, I do know why. It is because his last name is Squarepants and the title has the word “square” in the name.

Don’t leave me hanging. Let’s do it together in a nasally twang, shall we?:

“Cheeeeeesss Squuuuuuuuaaaaarres.”

Whew! I feel better. Although, any recipe that starts with a paragraph about a children’s cartoon and then proceeds to use the verse, “nasally twang” generally isn’t something that wets one’s appetite. Sorry about that.

I had first seen this recipe on Pinterest and then looked it up on the internet. I found it on so many sites, with no one really knowing where the recipe originally came from. I followed the Duncan Hines’ version, but used butter instead of margarine.

I generally do not post directions if it is not my recipe, but in this case I will. I needed to mention a few tips in the directions below that were not found in the recipe I followed. This is not my original recipe. It is someone else’s. Perhaps a certain sponge’s who dwells under the sea?

Ingredients:

1 package of yellow cake mix
3 eggs
1 stick of melted salted butter
8 oz. of softened cream cheese
1 pound (16 oz.) powdered sugar

Directions:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. If you have a convection oven then preheat to 325 degrees F.

In a stand mixer or with a hand mixer in a bowl, beat together one egg, cake mix and melted butter.

Press the dough into a greased 9 X 13 baking dish. I like to use a clear one, because it is pretty seeing the different layers.

Set aside 1/4 cup of the powdered sugar.

Combine the remaining powdered sugar, two eggs and cream cheese in your stand mixer or in a bowl with your hand mixer on medium speed until all ingredients are thoroughly mixed together.

Pour the mixture over the dough in the 9 X 13 pan.

Bake for thirty five minutes.

Remove from the oven and let cool for forty five minutes. Sprinkle the powdered sugar you set aside earlier over the dessert.

Check.

Cut into squares.

Check.

Serve (refrigerate remaining dessert).

Checkmate.

Crown yourself King Of The Sea and keep this yummy indulgence away from Patrick and Mr. Krabs. You will not want to share this.

July 16, 2014 by gn0mel0ver

When Pigs Fly Cry

The last time we went to the fair was when my daughter was eight and the moment we got there was the first and only time a child of ours has slammed their finger in the car door. She swears that this is why her thumb on her right hand is slightly larger than the other. I say it is the best souvenir ever. She doesn’t quite agree. Well, we went to the fair again this summer. I told her maybe she could get a souvenir for her other hand this time and then they would be even. The kid was not amused. I’m not sure why. I am very helpful.

When we got there, they had Monster Trucks that were tearing around the dirt arena one at a time. We made it through watching one truck. They are loud. And, well, how many times can you watch a truck go over a dirt hill?

That is a serious question.

My limit is seven. For life.

Have you ever heard a pig cry? I mean really heard a pig scream? Because we had not before the trip to the fair this summer. It is the most horrifying sound we had ever heard. The pig was ginormous. In fact, in searching for this picture on my camera, I had to do a double take. In my memory, the pig had been coal black with raised tufts of fur and gleaming red eyes. I was shocked to see a plain pink pig instead. Funny how the ~~crazy~~ mind works.

The pig was bellowing in a way that only monsters in my dreams do. Or kids slamming their fingers in car doors, but we won’t go there.

And then after terrifying everyone in its vicinity, the pig let out a torrential flow of urine that I thought was never, ever going to stop.

It was madness.

None of us will ever be the same.

The fair. It changes a person.

So, we decided to go eat some food. As one does after watching an animal relieve itself. Doesn’t that always make you hungry? In fact, I am sure you are thrilled just to be reading this right now.

We ate.

And we ate.

And then we could not eat any more. The best thing we had were the Tasty Chips. They were, well… I think you can guess.

We had fifty ride tokens to use from our Costco package. None of us wanted to do any rides. But we persevered. The kids went into The House of Mirrors. I stayed outside. I still find it terrifying. I am not the most space oriented person, and as a child I got helplessly lost in The House Of Mirrors. Then I watched “Watcher In The Woods” and I never went in the contraption again.

But sending my innocent children into The House of Mirrors?

Priceless.

They made it out in less than three minutes. They obviously take after their father.

And we played some games and lost $30. Or rather, we paid $30 for a small stuffed zebra that I do not think has migrated himself from the jungle of my car. Poor guy.

We rode on the carousel two times and my son went down the giant slide twice. He loved it. Times sure have changed since I was a kid. We used to fly down on burlap sacks. Now the kids have these fabric bags with straps. So fancy. It still looks frightening to me.

The kids had their sculptures made. That post can be found here.

We found a gnome hidden in the bonsai trees. So, he, of course, must be included in this post. He did not cry. Nor did he create any bodily fluids, but I still like him the best.

I had to take an outfit picture with my pink $10 H&M dress against the pink ride.

It was a pink day.

Pink ride.

Pink dress.

Pink pig.

Later that day I saw a pink elephant and I was tickled…

Have you been to a fair this summer? What memories and souvenirs do you bring home? Some folks go home with large stuffed animals. Some folks go home with full bellies. As for us, we go home with longer appendages and nightmares of screaming pigs.

I think we must be doing it wrong.

February 22, 2014 by gn0mel0ver

Pioneer Woman’s Best Chocolate Cake

A few months ago, I finally made a cake I had been wanting to make for forever. It was the Pioneer Woman’s Best Chocolate Cake. I have to agree with her. It really was the best chocolate cake I have ever had.

My whole family helped me make the first one. It was a fun family creation. It had enough steps where every one had a task. But it was still very easy.

I actually bought a commercial sheet pan from Amazon just to make this cake. When you think about how much a sheet cake costs at the store, this $12 was actually an incredibly decent price. The cake fits perfectly in this pan.

My husband requested this chocolate cake for his birthday cake two weeks ago. I decided to add something to the recipe. Sigh. I had read the comment section on her website. It seemed like a lot of people had this cake recipe in their family, except their family added cinnamon. We love cinnamon in our household. I figured it was a safe bet to try.

So, I added 1/4 of a teaspoon of cinnamon to the cake batter. That is it! 1/4 of a teaspoon! And it ruined the cake. It overwhelmed the cake. It was not good. At all. So, please just follow her recipe. Do not add the cinnamon or you will be crying on the inside as you throw away an entire sheet cake five days after you made it when nobody in your family will eat it. The first cake? Completely gone in four days.

I cannot wait to make this cake again! Sans cinnamon. It is amazing.

Have you made this cake? Have you ever added a seemingly innocent ingredient to a recipe only to have it completely fail?

Gnome Lover

Stumbling through life while still having fun

cake

Root Beer Chocolate Cake

Chess Squares

When Pigs Fly Cry

Pioneer Woman’s Best Chocolate Cake