March 28, 2014 by gn0mel0ver

Our Trip To Las Vegas

My husband and I were married in Las Vegas fifteen years ago. This is a picture of us on that day. My husband does not know I am sharing it. He. He. It is hard to believe this was us fifteen years ago. My hair was so short. And my husband has a beard now with (cough) grey hairs poking through. It is nice to look back at where we were. It makes me excited about where we are going.

I thought it would be a good idea to head back there for our anniversary. My husband and I both do not like to gamble. We don’t smoke. And, honestly, I am not fond of malls. I’ve never been to a strip club. I was not interested in any of the Circus du Soleil shows. And we would never just hang around a pool without our children (unless it was our own pool). Because of this, Las Vegas is generally not on our list of destinations to go to on our yearly romantic getaways.

But I decided we had not been there in almost nine years and maybe we would try it again.

Spoiler: there were good times and there were bad.

‘Tis life:

I got a fabulous deal on Hotwire for the Wynn Hotel. When we checked in, I mentioned we were there for our fifteenth wedding anniversary. They kindly upgraded us to a higher floor.

The hotel is amazing. Gorgeous. Stunning. It boasts the prettiest lobby I have ever seen. The most amazing scenery. The clientele leans towards the classy side. I have never seen so many beautiful women in one place. And of course, I broke out with the biggest zit on my chin just before we arrived. Truly showing I did not belong there.

The room was beautiful.

The hotel also sent up a sweet gift of chocolate covered strawberries for our anniversary.

And all would have been well.

Better than well.

It would have, should have, could have been amazing.

There was just a ~~slight~~ problem of the air conditioning not working in our room. And not working in the room we were subsequently moved to.

I am a baby when it comes to heat. I cannot sleep in a warm room. This led to me having a meltdown and many sleepless nights.

Hence, I have made the determination I could only stay here in the wintertime, if we came to Las Vegas again. I have to have a working air conditioning system in my hotel room.

In. The. Desert.

The little cafe restaurant at this hotel is the best restaurant we ate at while in Las Vegas.

Oh my gosh! I am a nut for a tuna sandwich. And on a croissant? The biggest croissant I have ever seen?! Made by the chef there?! So good! I ate this three times during our stay (and gained FIVE pounds in four days! Back to reality).

They also had a seafood club that my husband said was excellent.

And lava cake?!

And unlimited mimosas for breakfast for $19!!!!!!!!

And strawberry waffles?! I also saw the most beautiful buttermilk biscuits on a tray on our last day and was bummed I had not tried them (I seriously cannot figure out why I gained five pounds).

I highly recommend this little cafe. We would stay at The Wynn again just for this restaurant.

We ate at Tom Culicchio’s Heritage Steakhouse, because my husband and I are huge fans of Top Chef. The meal here was the most I have ever spent on a dinner. We ordered the cheapest bottle of wine on the menu at $65. The filet mignon steaks were $59 each. Like most nice steakhouses, sides are not included. We did not have appetizers or soup or salad. The steaks were just okay.

However, our waiter was awesome. We loved him. He made the whole experience.

For the bottle of wine, two steaks, two sides, and two coffees our total was over $200 before tip.

Ouch.

But now we know.

We also ate, quite by accident, at Raos in Little Caesar’s. It was fine.

It was pretty. It was romantic. The food was decent. Again, we are really spoiled with the Italian restaurants in our town, so I have high standards. This restaurant is about a seven out of ten for me.

We had the lasagna and prime rib noodle special.

The creme brûlée was not good. That makes me sad. And the reason it got a lower rating.

And so this is why we ate all of our remainder of our meals at Terrace Pointe Cafe at The Wynn. That restaurant is a ten out of ten for me. It is really good. We tried a lot of things and everything was amazing. It was also reasonably priced for Las Vegas.

We went to three shows while we were there. I felt like Goldilocks. One was not good, the other leaning towards bad and one was just right.

My husband and I had never heard of Daniel Tosh before, but we love comedy shows. We like to see one comedy show on every trip we take together (our first date was to a comedy show). We went in to the show with open minds.

Daniel Tosh is? Not a nice guy. I did find a lot of his material offensive. However, some of it was funny. And I did find myself in hysterics at some points during the show. I would not see him again, but I honestly did not mind it. His bit is offending everyone and everything. He claims to get an absurd amount of death threats daily. I believe it. It is the shock factor. Honestly, after The Book of Mormon, this did not faze me.

We saw La Reve at The Wynn, because we were staying there and it was convenient.

Hmmmm. How can I say this?

Nicely?

It wasn’t my favorite?

The theater is gorgeous. The entertainers are so talented. It has all of the components of a good show. A really good show. Except for a story and good music. I think that was what was so upsetting. This could be a fantastic show, but they need to scrap the “plot” and start over with a new script, new choreography and new music.

La Reve means “The Dream” and I felt like it was definitely going to put me to sleep.

Finally, the “just right.” We went and saw Absinthe. This show was amazing. It is raunchy. I mean raunchy. I mean… Okay, you get it. But don’t say I didn’t warn you. Or taunt you? I guess it depends on what kind of a show you like. If you have a problem with nudity or cursing or profanity, then this show is not for you. I found it so funny. It was in the right context. The cast is wonderfully talented. It is a burlesque circus show in a very small tent. It is located at Caesar’s Palace. It was amazing. Ten out of ten from me.

There are acrobats, two women who do actual burlesque acts complete with a bubble splashing tank, a couple who perform the craziest act on roller skates, a comedian, and a tightrope.

Fun!

I love a show called, “Teatro ZinZanni” which is a circus-like dinner theater show hosted by a drag queen that performs in Seattle (and used to also perform in San Francisco) in an old beautiful 1920’s circus tent . We have seen that show (it changes seasonally) four times. I was happy to find something similar to our old favorite.

I was captivated from the moment we sat down.

I would come to Las Vegas just to see this show again!

While my husband played in a poker tournament, I went and did some reviews at some of my favorite stores. Part one of my Anthropologie reviews is going up on Sunday. This is the outfit I wore when I went out by myself.

I bought one thing in Las Vegas. It is this summery yellow floral slip that I allowed myself to buy by claiming it was Vegas “underwear.” Yes, I can absolutely justify anything. Yes, this makes my husband a saint.

I wore it out one night with a different slip underneath it and a mustard cardigan over the top. This is because my feet were so swollen and blistered, I could not wear any of the cute dresses I had brought with me on the last night, because none of my high heels would fit on my feet. Thank you guys for telling me to bring comfy shoes. I would never have thought to bring flats otherwise. They were a lifesaver.

Our hotel was at the end of the strip and there was a lot of construction surrounding it. This meant a lot of taxi rides. Which resulted in a lot of overheards. And was one of my favorite parts of the trip. The taxi drivers here were friendlier than any I have ridden with in any other city.

One night when we were coming back to our hotel, a group of men were holding the door for people coming into the hotel. From watching “The Soup” on t.v., I knew immediately who one of the men was. It was the older gentlemen who is on that show “Gigilos.” I cross my heart that this was the same day I had put up my story about being mistaken as an escort and this time I had a male escort holding the door for me. The whole cast was there. I did not speak to them, but I noticed they were very polite to everyone as they made their way through the hotel.

And that was pretty much our trip. We will not be back for a long, long while. It will take my body some time to recuperate from that cigarette smoke. Broken down into ten descriptions:

Hot room

Expensive wine

Tuna croissants

Lots of shows

No sleep

Love

Stuffy nose

Taxi drivers

The house wins

Blisters

Have you been to Las Vegas? What was I missing? What is your favorite part?

P.S. In yesterday’s comments, Gwen had mused that it would be fun if other bloggers posted their wedding pictures today, too.

And Liana from Frock and Hound sweetly did. And it is gorgeous! Her wedding photo looks like a beautiful scene from a fairy tale. You can see it here, on her post A Look Back.

If you would like to share your wedding photo, please let me know and I will link it up here. Thank you! : )

March 27, 2014 by gn0mel0ver

It’s The Little Things: Being Home

I have a theme (or a bad habit). And that theme is I will have a post ready to go for my “little things” weekly section, but something else will inspire me more. So, that post gets pushed off indefinitely. And I write some random things instead.

But they come from the heart.

That’s gotta count for something?

Right?

While we were in Vegas, we had a good time, but there is just something wonderful about coming home. I wanted to share the little things that made my heart sing yesterday.

It’s good to be home.

Coffee! From a pot! From my very own pot! Oh, how I missed this. The hotel we stayed at did not have a coffee maker. I yearned for it. And I yearned for a cup of coffee that cost less than $3.

And water. In a glass. Filtered water in a glass. Free filtered water in a glass! Know my soul is splashing in this container right now.

My pillow. My very own pillow. Devoid of stranger’s drool. How I missed thee.

My kids. Okay. No pictures of them, but they were the best part.

My puppies.

It is funny, because Ollie could care less that we are home. If anything, he is sad, because our house-sitter lets him sleep in our bed (resulting in our whole bedroom getting scrubbed before I will go to bed). Murphy was extremely excited. But then he spent the whole night guarding the bed in case Ollie got any ideas that he belonged there.

Fresh baked cookies. These are my new favorite cookies. I will have the recipe up next week. I have been thinking about them all week.

What’s your favorite thing about coming home? What do you miss the most?

It’s The Little Things: Enjoying what you have, where you are at. In other words, home.

Also, the sound of ch-ching! is absent in my house. I find this to be my most favorite thing so far about being back. Unfortunately my mind has not quite come to terms with the silence. And even now as I lay in bed in the dark, slot machines are invading my quiet.

But it still does not compare to my very least favorite thing:

Laundry. Ugh. Laundry. How I did not miss thee.

Let me get back to being grateful for water while I fold clothes and lose money to the slots in my head.

P.S. Tomorrow I will have a huge post up about our Las Vegas trip. Complete with a picture of our wedding from fifteen years ago (just don’t tell my husband I’m putting it on the blog!). : )

March 24, 2014 by gn0mel0ver

The Chocolate John Do-nut And The Lemon MaJam

Since my husband and I are at this very moment in Las Vegas, I think it is only fitting to share the first trip I ever took to Las Vegas:

When I was nineteen (eeep! Mom! Shield your eyes!) I drove down with my girlfriend to “sin city.” To see what it was all about. Just to browse, you see. Nothing devious. Wouldn’t dream of it. We had very little money. We just sat in the lobby. And okay, we gambled.Cause, um, we did. And we won $40! Woot! Not that I am advocating underage gambling. Wouldn’t dream of it. Just keepin’ the story real here. Don’t be like me, kids.

So, we were sitting in the lobby of a hotel to catch our bearings before making the four hour drive back home. Thanks Mom and Dad for the gas (Sorry!). ; ). We decided the best place to not get caught in our underage deviousness was to stay by the elevator benches. The benches happened to be near three pay phones.

My friend sat on a bench across from me.

I sat all alone on my bench. And okay, maybe, just maybe I was dressed a bit on the risqué side. This was, after all, the nineties. Halter tops were all the rage. Or was that just me? It was also the point in my life where I would work out twice a day, so yeah, I kind of rocked that halter top. I can say that now, because everything that was in the halter top that was good and worth writing about has long since fallen and poofed out. Never to be seen again. Or written about in present tense. Without crying.

Sob.

As I was sitting on my bench, a middle aged, short stalky bald-headed man walked up to the pay phones. He made a call. After about five minutes of staring at me, he finally approached me.

This is what I remember him saying, “Chocolate donut?”

To which I replied, “What?”

I guess that was not the correct response. He got flustered, began patting his bald head that had begun to bead with sweat with a handkerchief, and walked back to the pay phones. Before he placed another call on the pay phone, the most gorgeous blonde I have ever seen walked past. She paused at the bench I was sitting at. I will never forget her or what she was wearing.

She was wearing a creamy yellow suit that was demure and came down to just past her knees. Her ivory white top was just barely unbuttoned. She wore four inch stilettos and smelled like heaven. She exuded money and class.

I just stared at her.

Then the weird little bald-headed sweaty man approached her, too.

I wanted to warn her that he was obsessed with pastries.

But before I could, he whispered to her, “Chocolate donut.”

Instead of looking at him like he was deranged, like I had…

She calmly replied, “lemon jam.”

~~They~~ He excitedly and very quickly got into an elevator together and made it up to another floor of the hotel. I’ll never forget how beautiful and poised she looked standing next to him. How very business-like and professional. Completely opposite of what I thought someone who liked lemon jam would ever look like.

Hmmm. Where do you think they were going?* Because as far as I know chocolate donuts and lemon jam do not and never will go together. Maybe they found something else to do.

I just can’t imagine what.

Do you think that little man ever got that chocolate donut he was so craving?

Because now I kinda want one. Not gonna lie. Good thing I don’t have a halter top to fit into or any lemon jam to make.

* Yes. I know. I know what they were doing. Just bein’ funny… I know they were totally making pastries that she was…um…selling.

Isn’t that what the kids are calling it these days?

Or is that just me again?

March 22, 2014 by gn0mel0ver

I Will. I Do. I Do. I Will.

I don’t know why, but I am addicted to those bridal shows on t.v. I don’t care what show it is. “Say yes to the dress” in any city, “Four Weddings,” and even sometimes, “Something Borrowed, Something New” (although I hate this show with a fierce passion. Fierce. Passion).

If it is on, my brain becomes fixated on the white flowy gowns.

Here is something funny I heard a mom say to her daughter on one of those shows when there were not enough sequins on her dress: “It needs more embezzlements.”

Yes, it does.

I bet a dress like that would ~~take~~ go for a lot of money.

My husband and I got married in a whirlwind of quick planning in Las Vegas. We loved every second of our wedding. First, that my mom planned it. We would never have done it otherwise. The cake was delicious (the most important part). It was quick. It was easy. I loved my dress. It was supposed to have a bow removed, because the original wedding was planned and all ready had a deposit at a different venue for July. Plenty of time to order a bowless dress.

Well, a little something unplanned happened. And my dress was not going to fit when July came. So, we quickly planned a wedding for March.

My dress arrived. With the bow. This is where the good part happens. I had gained a little weight (see unplanned occurrence above) and the zipper broke an hour before the ceremony. But the bow hid it! Providence.

I would only change one thing about my wedding. Okay two. My dad got so nervous about walking me down the aisle that we practically ran. Seriously, he still laughs about it.

Second, what my husband said during our vows. Growing up, every little girl dreams of the “I dos.” Some of them may even practice saying them in preparation for the day those two words actually get to come out of their mouths (definitely not dressed in white and definitely not involving a dog if any kind).

Here is a bit of trivia I was not privy to until my wedding day. Little boys. Well, little boys don’t think of that moment at all. I am pretty sure that until their actual wedding day, those two words never even enter their minds.

Sometimes they never do enter their minds.

Even on their wedding day.

I wish I had known that.

It was finally my our moment.

I listened to the officiant rattle off the long list of things my husband was to agree to. And then we waited for his answer.

“I will.”

I did a double take. Wait. Wha?! What happened to “I do”? This was not what was supposed to happen! My OCD flared up. Now, my answer would not match his! The officiant turned to me and began to recite the terms I was to agree to. I didn’t hear any of it. All I could think of is, what the heck am I going to say?!

Silence.

I realized it was my turn to answer. My moment.

So, I pulled a Jenni. I just repeated both things. And I added an extra one in to make up for my husband’s edited version of the words. It had to be even. You know, OCD and all of that.

This is what I said, ” I do. I will. I do.”

I think my husband realized at that moment what had happened. He had married a crazy lady. The rest of the ceremony was a blur.

A beautiful blur.

But now whenever I watch any wedding show on t.v., I wait for those two words to be spoken. Inevitably, about a third of the time, “I will,” is said.

I looked it up and the consensus is divided on which saying is correct. I guess it just depends on what sounds best to you. What your venue might prefer. What you ~~and your dog~~ practiced when you were little.

This just shows you that you really cannot know what is going to happen in life. Planning has never been my forte. I never thought I would be married in Las Vegas. Or that my wedding would be moved up by many months. I couldn’t predict that my husband would not choose to say the words I had rehearsed in my head for decades. But do I cherish the impulsive memories? Will I look back in fondness at the unexpected surprises?

I will.

Do you remember which words were spoken at your wedding ceremony or the last one you attended?

I do.

P.S. Yesterday was my fifteenth wedding anniversary. I wrote this in honor of it. We are at this very moment in Las Vegas celebrating where it all began. I have posts scheduled every day while we are away. If I do not get to your comments today, please know I will respond A.S.A.P.! But it might not be today. : )

Thank you! : )

Gnome Lover

Stumbling through life while still having fun

vegas

Our Trip To Las Vegas

It’s The Little Things: Being Home

The Chocolate John Do-nut And The Lemon MaJam

I Will. I Do. I Do. I Will.