For whatever reason, last year my children stumbled upon Bert & Ernie’s “The Ernie & Bert Book” in a pile of old children’s books from my own childhood. I had no recollection of the book. Minutes after discovering the book, they both came running into my room holding the book and squealing with laughter.
“You’ve got to read this book, Mom,” my oldest proclaimed.
“Um, not so much,” was my response because having all ready proven that I am such a fantastic mother that at the age of thirteen and ten my children had just discovered Bert and Ernie…And a pile of children’s books they should both have read many years before, I was content continuing with my parenting ideal: avoidance.
“No, really! I promise it’s funny.” They both had excitement bursting through their skin. I was surprised they did not explode into a Sesame Street Muppet pile of fur.
I contemplated the mess that would make.
I examined the book. It was very thin, but what if that was an illusion? I weighed the time it would take for me to read it versus the time it would take to argue about reading it.
I opened the book.
It started off innocently enough.
Bert and Ernie, being the loving roommates that they were, were in a bit of a pickle. You see, Ernie had lost Bert’s cowboy hat. And in a series of unfortunate events, Bert worries through questions that pop up with each crazy item Ernie produces to him.
It is like that book, “If You Give A Mouse A Cookie.”
Except with two roommates and a cowboy hat.
It starts with this line: “Ernie, why should I put a pot on my head?”
My husband has asked me that exact same line before. Just go with it Bert. It will all work out for you.
Ernie then proceeds to lead Bert through their house and they both examine the ridiculous ways Ernie has fabricated objects into doing tasks they were not produced to do. The tension is building.
It builds up to the best line I have ever read in a book:
“Now what am I going to wear when I play cowboy?”
Oh, how many times have I asked myself that very same question, Bert.
Giddyup!