“What’s in the box?”

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My husband is used to boxes arriving at the door. His face kind of screws itself up into a question mark as he sees another package arrive and I try to stop it before it turns into a full scowl.

The exchange usually goes like this:

“There’s another package for you.”

And then me:

“I only bought three things for ten dollars each! They shipped them all in separate boxes. I swear!”

But by this time, I am usually holding an armful of plastic or cardboard and my audience has left to pursue something more interesting.

Kinda like what is probably happening with this blog post.

The other day a large box came. Large enough to pique his curiosity.

Big.

Big enough to hold anything.

Big enough to hold something fun.

Maybe something masculine.

So, he brings the box in from outside and he asks me, “What’s in the box?”

And I tried to think of something funny to say. But my brain was blank because I could honestly not recall ordering anything. No clothes. No books. Nothin’. Those same answers could be used if you swapped out the word “box” and inserted “your head” instead. Just so ya know.

“I don’t know,” I replied honestly.

“It’s not mine. Did you order anything?” I like to pass those big cardboard surprises off as soon as they are dropped upon my doorstep.

My husband examined it further. “It’s from Walmart,” he said without enthusiasm.

I knew the box was definitely not for me.

“Well, it’s not mine,” I proudly snorted.

So, my husband took the ginormous box and placed it on the floor. We stood around it, as though we had never received a delivery before. My hopes were not too high about a box from Walmart.

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My husband opened the box.

Then he looked at me. And he rolled his eyes. From the depths of the box, he began to pull out long blue cylinders. The cylinders had one word on them, “Wondra.”

“Oh, yeah. I forgot. I ordered some Wondra from Walmart.”

“You ordered some Wondra?” He said his voice dripping with sarcasm (Wondra would take care of that) as he was still pulling cylinder after cylinder from the depths of the box.

He stacked them side by side. They formed a long row of floury heaven. A caterpillar formed from discounted baking products.

It was wonderful.

My inner hoarder clapped her hands with delight. She sighed with contentment. She danced a little jig and rebelliously began shaking the flour all over the house.

Real life Jenni stood facing the amusement mixed with the irk of her husband and tried not to smile.

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“It’s only a three month supply,” I smugly proclaimed. Because if I had given into my hoarding temptation, I would have doubled the order and had a healthy six month supply at my ready.

“Why couldn’t she just go and get Wondra at Walmart?” Good question. Yes, I can hear your thoughts.

I can no longer go to Walmart, because I had a very real-seeming dream in which I was shopping at Walmart and I was held hostage by the scariest man.

So, you can see why I can no longer go there.

It is for safety’s sake. I am nothin’ if not careful.

And guess what? Walmart delivered my Wondra for free!

It is astounding the things that I know the lengths I will go to to avoid going to the store.

My husband is so proud.

18 thoughts on ““What’s in the box?”

  1. My hubby is used to all of the deliveries too. Although, most of the time he is getting just as many as he orders a lot of car parts. I have yet to try Wondra – I will have to soon!

    • It is easier when they get deliveries, too. Most of the time it is comic books for my husband. He is making up for it when we head to Comic Con in a few days. So, I am not feeling too bad. Wondra is awesome!

      Have a happy Wednesday!

      Jenni

  2. I had to go and look up what Wondra is. What do you use it in that you need so much of it? I want to see where you put all of those cans ; )

    You always remember your dreams so vividly.

    bisous
    Suzanne

    • I use Wondra in all off my cookie recipes. It is a very fine flour. It almost feels like beach sand. If you substitute a little more than half of the flour a cookie recipe calls for with Wondra, your cookies should not get hard. At least mine don’t. It is my favorite.

      My daughter just told me that she has been dreaming every night that a doll is in her closet with my face and it keeps trying to get out but she slams the closet door only to have her brother let it in! Aaaaahhhhh!

      It runs in the family. : )

      Have a great week!

      Jenni

    • Thank you Dawn. Wondra is a fine flour. I use it in my cookie recipes. I have found that if you substitute a little more than half of the flour in a cookie recipe with Wondra the cookies stay soft. I love that! And I make a lot of cookies! : )

      Have a terrific week!

      Jenni

  3. I was going to say, “a kitten is in the box!”
    Isn’t Wondra a thicker flour? My husband uses Panko in his meatloaf which is really good.
    Have fun cooking and baking,
    Stacey

    • Hi Stacey! Oh my gosh! A kitten in the box would be much more exciting than flour!

      Wondra is a very fine flour. It is used in gravy a lot. It is great for that because it does not clump so you do not need to be careful with it. I actually add mine to my cookies to keep them soft. I hate when cookies get hard.

      I hope you are having sweet dreams! Now I want meatloaf! : )

      Jenni

  4. I love when you talk about your husband’s reaction to some of the stuff you do. Husbands as a rule are funny. They just don’t understand us sometimes! I am now going to look up Wondra to see what it is and if I need some too!

    • Yes, they are funny. He is always making me laugh at his reaction to things. Although I have been catching up on my “True Blood” and he does not see the appeal in that show so I turned it off so I would not have to see his reaction to it today. Now I need to know what happened and I must wait for tomorrow. Sigh.

      Have a gorgeous week!

      Jenni

  5. This was a good post! It is interesting how dreams can alter our behavior, isn’t it? Husband’s reactions are funny too. I was shopping in a foreign country where I don’t speak the language. I came out of the dressing room and I wanted my husband’s opinion on my dress and to translate to the attendant in case I needed another size. My husband was nowhere to be found. Another woman’s husband near the dressing room who didn’t speak my language went and got my husband for me because he understood what I needed without understanding my words. I was so impressed! His wife had trained him so well! I need to take some lessons from his wife.

    • Thank you! And I love your story! I want to know if you ended up getting that dress. I need to picture if you wear it and remember that time period. That would be awesome!

      Have a great week!

      Jenni

  6. Hilarious! This is why I get my stuff unpacked and stored before the Hubby comes home 😉 Just kidding..kind of…:)
    Though around Christmas time and after Black Friday sales, I had to explain how they ship things separately because my Husband was starting to panic!! 🙂

    • Thank you Alicia! It is so crazy how they ship things separately. I just used a gift card for four items (a pair of shoes, two accessories and a dress) and they shipped it in three separate packages! I get so embarrassed at what the mail woman must think.

      Have a beautiful Thursday!

      Jenni

  7. Hahaha! I laughed out loud at the “Maybe something masculine” line. Too funny. You know what, though? I don’t even know what Wondra is! And now I need to know since you felt you needed a three month supply of it! lol I have to go check into it and regale Kyle with my knowledge of Wondra this evening over dinner. He will be so thrilled. Maybe it’ll distract him from my own boxes I’m having delivered from Asos and Betsey Johnson tonight. There’s no way he’s going to think there’s anything masculine in there for him…

    <3 Liz
    http://www.withwonderandwhimsy.com

    • Oh, you will love Wondra, but Kyle cannot halve the cookie recipe. Just substitute a little over half of the flour a cookie recipe calls for with Wondra and the cookies will stay softer. I also use it if I need t thicken a sauce quickly because it does not clump. It is pretty amazing stuff! I love ASOS. I have never ordered from them. I cannot wait to see what you got!

      Have a delightful Saturday!

      Jenni

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